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Inspiration for “I Want To Feel” Spoken Word Poetry

If you haven’t yet heard the poem, I Want To Feel, then click here to watch the video.  

I Want To Feel is a spoken word love poem for love.
It is my encouragement for every woman to activate and own her feminine energy and express her desire to want love, to give love, and to make love.

I wrote, “I Want To Feel,” as a challenge to myself to speak out my desires and reconnect with my feminine power. I wanted to shed the mask of the harder, more masculine version of me I carried for many years as a way to appear less vulnerable. As I unfold into my womanhood as a daughter, a sister, a lover, a mother, I’m breaking down cultural limitations that I’ve internalized and letting myself return to my true essence. I am a curious, open, nurturing, loving soul. It has been quite a journey of revisiting who I truly am; loving her as an expressive being. I am choosing to live from this wondrous place.

More thoughts on the topic:

I believe that Inside every woman, lives a deep desire to be free to unleash the full potential of her sensuality, sexuality, her nurturer spirit and the brightness of her light that comes from owning her femininity. Every woman wants to freely express her nature in her own unique way. Every woman wants to explore the playground of her body, her mind, and her spirit. Every woman wants to know the full extent of her womanhood. No matter how repressed, restrained, confined, or overly masculine she appears–this is the truth. For some women, it comes easy to live out their essence. For most, it takes time and some effort to be reintroduced to her feminine self and own it. And some, never do.

Although it is freely available, many of us only live our feminine selves at a half-mass level. It is much easier for us to speak up about how we want to be treated politically, at work, or at school. It is much more of a challenge to own up to our own desires; what we dream about; what we want for and from OUR SELVES; what we want from our relationships; the way we want to be treated and tended to in every way. To speak up in this way, requires vulnerability and moments of quiet to delve into ones self and really listen to what you’ve been yearning for. Know that you deserve whatever it is that you’ve been longing for. THEN, tend to it. Give THAT to yourself. No one can give you what you don’t already give to yourself. If they did, you wouldn’t even be able to recognize it because you haven’t had it to know it. So start with you.

Openness and Sensuality/Sexuality:

I will admit–sometimes it gets hard to be open to your own fantasies and desires when the world tells you that you’re a hoe for expressing yourself and exploring yourself, in particular, with others. Then it gets more confusing when the world tells you that you must be sexually enticing or experienced to be competent and desirable as a woman… otherwise… you’re condemned to loneliness. Somehow, we end up feeling shame for having “too much” of a sexual past or persona or ashamed for not having enough sensuality or sexual experiences or not having had any sexual partners at all. And for many of us, if not most, having a negative sexual experience or trauma adds a depth of confusion and hurt to an already muddled situation. Add a few break-ups, some bad takeaways… and there it is… the beginning of the end of your feminine power, your voice, self-confidence, and the rise of “never agains.” Never again will I nurture a man. Never again will I love so hard. Never again will I be vulnerable… never again, never again, never again. Then comes the dimming down of that light that every woman has, and, so deeply desires to explore and have explored. That light that every man so deeply craves.

But we must resist that chatter that does the dimming: “I’m an independent woman, I don’t need a man.” “I’m not looking to take care of someone.” “I don’t want to get hurt.” “I’m a mom… I don’t have time for a man in my life–my kids are my life.”

Making negative chatter your truth and denying your inner desires, is truly the greatest disservice to your life and the love that you deserve that is so abundantly available to you. It is also a repellent to those who live openly, love boldly, and own their walk in life. It’s a repellent to a confident, masculine man who naturally desires that feminine energy and light in a relationship. And it is definitely a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Listen: no one should ever need someone to be happy or have anyone in their lives to hold them back. And most definitely, no one should ever be allowed to take away from a mother-child relationship. But it sure does feel nice to say outloud, “I want to love and be loved back with the same magnitude.” And it feels even better to be touched and caressed, and made love to, and tended to and listened to and cared for by a masculine, beautiful, abundant, open minded, independent, loving, honest, spiritual, worldly, conscious, sexy, high valued man. Ya heard me! And it feels good to just feel dainty, delicate, delicious, wanted, desired, sexy, feminine. Can I get an Amen?

BUT… it starts with how you feel about you. Do you love you? Do you love you enough to uphold what you deserve and ground yourself in your divine feminine power? Do you understand that the only way for you to do that is choose to love you every day?

You can choose to love yourself by celebrating the brilliance of your nature. The brilliance of your sex. The brilliance of your heart and the reality that it is because of the power of the force of femininity that the world exists.

Wear beautiful bold colors that you typically would never. Where one solid red scarf or a pair of bright blue shoes with your typical attire or paint your nails beautiful colors, varying them every week. Then work your way up to full on outfits that make you feel bold, sexy, alive, confident, beautiful… who you really are inside.

Use language that focuses on the positive aspects of your day, your family, your work and your life, in general. Limit negative talk about others and events from the news and gossip. Because positive and negative aspects of life are always available, you get to choose to focus your mind on the positive and that reinforces your light.

Minimize dialogue with negative and toxic people. Everyone knows and loves/loved someone who is toxic. There’s no way to bypass the weight and the darkness they cast on our sunshine. So, love them from a distance. Then fill your life up with like minded, open, empowered, encouraging new friends.

And the most powerful and instant way you can feel your light and share it, is to just smile all day. It is simplest, most magical way to ignite your femininity.

When you feel wonderful because of how you adjusted your outfits, your language, the people around you, your demeanor, you will know that you’ve been under a spell by how you’ve presented yourself to the world AND… yourself.

Open yourself up to the possibilities of who you can be, how you can be, what you really want, and what feels right for you. It takes some boldness to let go of limiting beliefs. To walk in your light. But it really does start with you giving yourself permission to feel sensual, beautiful, alive, empowered, and open to what makes you a woman.

 

The abundance of receiving love starts with having an abundance of love for yourself. When you decide to free yourself from your own limiting beliefs about who you are as a woman and embrace that you truly do deserve to feel good about yourself, love in it’s abundant form will be apparent everywhere you turn. Just start by owning every inch of you in the mirror. Say, “all of this (your body) is mine… all mine.” Say, “I get to have this (every inch of you) everyday and I LOVE IT.” Speak that love into existence until you have 100% convinced yourself that this is the truth (because it is) and anyone who meets you will only know this truth that is you. This loving, confident, magnetic energy that inspires anyone before you to love themselves, too.

You are free when you are living your truths. When you are the source of your empowerment. When you own every part of you: the stuff you like and the stuff you’re working on. When you explore the parts of you that wants to feel, taste, touch, smell, see, all that life has to offer. When you can have compassion for yourself. When you live from that child-like curiosity about life and others and the exploration of your world–the one inside and the world around you. When you can bring that profound sense of wonder and self-love and compassion into your expressions and interactions, it is liberating for everyone in your presence. By saying what you want from your deepest feminine desires, and living from who you really are, you give everyone permission to do the same.

Doing so openly, unapologetically, and lovingly is liberating for you AND the people that need to know how to love you.

Their is beauty and strength in vulnerability, desire, and openness.

Enjoy the poem (video above) and remember to do life brilliantly,

Mical Asefaw–

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How To DLB (Do Life Brilliantly)

Straight up, no chaser… here we go:

  1. Create a ritual… and… stick to it. This is the first on the list because it is literally how you can manufacture a sense of self value and self confidence. In life, we make promises–to ourselves and others–and at times, we find ourselves breaking them. Do that enough times and you will lose a sense of value in your own word, which in turn affects your self respect, then your self worth… and then out goes your sense of self confidence. So, create trust for yourself by every morning (or evening) creating a ritual where you give yourself attention on your mind, your body, your soul. For example: get on your stationary bike for an hour, then journal for about 15 minutes while you sip your coffee (or green tea), and then meditate for about 10 minutes, to get you centered–all before you jump in the shower and get your day started. For you folks with kids, it might be a bit tricky (your Girl knows all about it). So wake up at unspeakable hours and get to your ‘me-time’ before the babies wake up and it’s all about them (rightfully so:)).
  2. Remove toxic people from your life. If you can’t exactly get rid of them, then little by little, diminish contact. Here’s how: at first, just don’t call, let them call you. When they call, pick up at first, but over time, start to let calls go to voicemail. Eventually, pick up and let them know you’ve started a project that will take up much of your time (the project is your new life!) and don’t go into much detail. Toxic people don’t usually care so much about your life, but allow you to talk about what you’re up to because it gives them a turn to talk about themselves and the drama in their lives (that is why they are toxic!). So keep it general when you talk about you and let them do much of the talking until phone calls get boring to them. Don’t react to their efforts to get info out of you because that will undo the process you’ve started to taper off contact. They’ll seemingly have an opinion or advice on what you shared and then revert attention back to them, prolonging chances of their toxicity penetrating your new found sense of motivation.
  3. Forgive anyone who’s hurt you. Easier said than done. But it is highly necessary and very much impossible to live that life of brilliance if you have the weight and darkness of the past hurts casting shadows and weighing you down. You MUST let go of your past hurts to embrace new, loving experiences and people who are attracted to your light.
  4. Make new, high quality friends and take care of the current friendships that replenish you. Join a group of some sort where everyone is learning a new activity that requires partnership or dialogue. This creates the opportunity to talk to new people and automatically have something in common… your new interest in the activity that brought you together. It also allows you to add new, fun moments to your current friendship and deepen your bonds. Check out step 5 for more ideas.
  5. Make your life interesting. Learn a new skill. Take up swimming (that one’s for me). Take up martial arts (also for me). Take up cooking lessons. (Love a man who can throw-down…just saying). Take up a dance class that will allow you the chance to get into your body and out of your head. Learning salsa, for example, is a phenomenal way to become more sexy, skilled on the dance floor, learn a new culture (if salsa isn’t already part of your culture:)), be more confident, make new friends, and overall, become an interesting person. Love me a man who can move… just saying.
  6.  Dress to impress… yourself. Put on something that makes you feel sexy, desirable, strong, confident, competent, untouchable, but also… touchable;). And when you assemble that outfit, don’t forget to look in the mirror and tell yourself, “I am the shiznit!”
  7. Journal, my friends. Journaling allows you to hear, see, and process your thoughts and emotions. Here is where you can vent about an issue without anyone getting hurt or ever knowing you felt that way. Here is where you release negativity and then tell yourself what you want to see happen and what you’ve learned in the process. Here’s where you celebrate you! People often ask, “how can I love myself?” Well, this process allows you to get to know yourself on an intimate level. When you know you, you start to build compassion for yourself and you begin to love you more. So have a journal date with just you, the journal and a beautiful breakfast/dinner over a  beautiful view or in a cozy spot at home. Do this especially before you go into confronting anyone about an issue. It will help you generate a positive intention, formulate your logic and throw out any illogical thoughts you might possibly bring into your sit down. No therapist needed. Get your mind and your heart right without a bill, ya heard me?!
  8. Exercise and get your body right. Nothing tops this. When you’re body is right, so is your mind. Period. You feel good so you think good. Amazingly enough, the world responds with the same respect for the time and discipline you put into your body, mind, and soul. This goes back to creating a ritual in Step 1.
  9. Eat good and healthy. You really are what you eat. Every single cell in your body draws on your food sources to regenerate. So eating foods that replenish and hydrate you mean you are the shiznit on a cellular level! BTW, eating good can absolutely be healthy. So many recipes out there in the world. In fact, I’ll be posting some on DLB. So look out for them.
  10. Finally, if you have any thing you need to own up to in your life–anyone you know you’ve done wrong or let down–then, damn it, own your shit and make amends. Apologize and MEAN IT. There’s nothing that eats away at your sense of who you are and your wellbeing than knowing you have hurt someone who’s still walking this earth. For those who’ve passed on, you can still own up to whatever was unsaid. Apologizing to someone helps them heal, but it’s really about you letting go and giving yourself the chance to do better. People who’ve passed on aren’t worried about the life they’ve lived on Earth. That is why it does not matter whether you can call them up over the phone, or talk to them in spirit. So, even though this is at the bottom of the list on how to Do Life Brilliantly, this is where I would start.

Alright, my DLBers! It’s been real. Let me know your thoughts.

Leave a comment below.

Until the next post… Do life brilliantly!

Mical Asefaw–